i can't move another inch

I've been watching way too much Gossip Girl lately. It just resonates so much with my life y'know? I feel like I can relate to all the characters, each in their different ways. Total bullshit. I think that's just a side-effect from way too much spare time and absolute and utter boredom and weird screwy weather. At the moment, I'm in an empty house, as Maman went away for the weekend, and une petit Diable (little brother) is staying with Papa, and the wind was howling a gale outside before. It's quietened down now, but I'm sure I'll wake up at about 4 to the sound of a violent thunderstorm. And it's meant to be summer in 2 days? Weird. Last week was a massive heat wave. Have to admit, this weather definately suits me. I will never get sick of saying how much I love winter. It is MY season. Seriously, waking up at 5am to drive your mum to the airport in that state of almost dark, but almost dawn, and grey skies, and amazing rain is the life. I'd never get sick of that. Then, after dropping mum there, me and R (brother!!) journeyed to the Central Market where we parked in a completely empty carpark (possibly due to it being 6.30 in the morning), and wandered around the almost deserted stalls, where we'd occasionally run into men unpacking flowers, and fruit, and not to mention the love of my life who works at the coffee shop where we had breakfast. I think his mum owns it actually. I think I may be coming to terms with the possibility he's gay though, because (as previously mentioned in the extensive babble about my failed attempt at a successful love-life), I suck with finding properly available men. Seriously, they either have a girlfriend, or are gay. Or, in unfortunate cases, are both. Well, it seemed highly likely at the time anyway.

This is another side effect from all my spare time. I talk absolute SHIT. I can only think of one positive to the fact that this brilliant rain will most probably clear up in the next few days to let forth the violent sun; and that is, I turn 18 in five days. I'm not even excited. I'd rather drink coffee and look at the gay love of my life. Rather than have a birthday. Just look at him. I wouldn't even mind a non physical relationship, just as long as he'd let me look at him.

Current music:
Sweet Disposition - The Temper Trap
E.S.T. - White Lies
Watchman, what is left in the night? - Greycoats (This one's amazing. I'm planning on learning to play it on the piano. Sounds quite simple, non?)